The Fall Guy

I should start this by saying, I dislike violence. I don't watch police shows and can't tolerate people punching each other. I also don't include it in any of my writing.

I should backtrack to say I grew up in the Sixties, in the suburbs of Los Angeles in a neighborhood that was middle class. There were a lot of professionals on my street and one of my favorite memories is of my neighbor, who was a jockey. On weekend afternoons, in off-season, after he had a bit to drink, he liked to hitch up his kids on the rear open door of his station wagon and then he’d take off down the hill. I can still see his son tumbling out, his puny father red-faced and gunning the engine.

However, my parents didn't engage in these type of activities. My mother insisted that my upbringing be sheltered. Why she wasn’t concerned about my brother Alfred, I don’t know, but she shielded me from violence; including television shows, movies and people and decided I shouldn't be near them. Being sensitive as I am, it was a wise decision on her part. However, whenever I saw anything remotely tough, such as kids falling, I'd let out the biggest scream you ever heard, (I often scared others with the shriek of my voice) was petrified, immobilized and later would have a nightmare.

I’m medium height now, but when I was young I was always the tallest. I had pale skin and was always bruised or eaten up by mosquitoes. Despite being articulate and gifted at the art of argument, I was not a threat. I'd give pennies to kids not to step on ants. However, I did have a journal that I wrote in faithfully. Every night I wrote down my thoughts and placed the journal under my bed. If I knew the cleaning lady was coming, I'd stash it into a tin, and hide it in a drawer. And every morning before I went off to breakfast, I read my journal and laughed. Unfortunately, one summer when a couple of kids were playing hide-n-seek at my house (we were always at our house, never at theirs) one of my friends hid under my bed and read the journal. I only found this out later.

There was a girl on our street who was an Amazon. Huge, powerful, strong, and I wrote down in my journal, meaning it as a compliment, she could have been the leader of the Green Berets. She didn’t take that well. I, oblivious, walked into the circle of girls one afternoon and she started spatting out words from my journal. Then she was coming at me, when my brother intervened and she punched him instead. She got into trouble. He spent the rest of the week with a bandage over his nose and my mother made me stay home and told me to watch musicals.

But I still remember the horror of the moment when I realized she was coming my way. That was the most terrifying moment. It was the feeling of exposure. Like people who don't know a writer and are reading their words and criticizing them. It’s something I think about at the start of a new semester. I understand when I see how nervous my students are about having strangers read their work and I sympathize. We all just want some mercy.

How about you? Have you ever gotten into trouble with your writing or been able to laugh at it afterwards?

Down a dark road

I ask myself what is the value of a book today– that a company like Barnes and Noble claims to have sold fewer devices for digital content for the last year than expected. Meanwhile, it’s retail store sales are sinking. This leads me to believe that altering sales strategies isn’t going to boost results and they were better off not making as many revisions. But then again, I am not an Economist and I come from the Old World, morphing into sadness every time I come across a bookstore closing. I find great pleasure in reading and being in a bookstore ranks as one of the finest places to be. But now all I have are memories. 

In the past, I have written about book signings I attended but here some literary moments worth mentioning. In Frankfurt, I heard and met the wonderful Mexican writer and poet, Octavio Paz, who had just won the Nobel Prize for Literature, as he talked about the aftermath of communism. In Berlin I met American author and feminist Barbara Ehrenrich who discussed the mid-life crisis. In New York I met author Amy Tan who spoke of being the daughter of immigrants– something I could identify with. In Pasadena, I came across the talented Lisa See, the dynamic Dexter Scott King and activist Christopher Kennedy Lawford.
I should add that these signings were not held at Barnes & Noble. During my eight years in the desert I have only attended two book signings; one held at the Main Public Library and the other at UNLV. However, a month ago on a Sunday afternoon, I headed to my local Barnes & Noble store. A line had formed outside, I found out that Tattoo artist Kat Von D, was signing copies of her book. My mind went on red alert– does she write? Do tattoos fall into the category of non-fiction, I wondered.  Personally, I associate them with tribal rituals, as a form of initiation, a vibrational energy from the first chakra;  a force that says who you are because you belong to the clan.  In my opinion it sends out another message- since our culture has no form of initiations people make up their own to try to feel safe in the world. I can’t understand why people don’t use music or buy canvases to express themselves, why they allow another to use their skin as a drawing board.  Now back to Kat; I remember her causing a split in a marriage… I don’t associate her as an author.  If this is a reflection of the changing tide, then clearly, I am not suited for it. Does Barnes & Noble consider their demographics? Who buys more books, I ask: kids under 25 or women like me, who frequent bookstores and are willing to invest in hard-cover?
The bookseller claims they have been under pressure from Amazon and Apple Inc. Perhaps their diminished revenue comes from making poor choices and by trying to cater to a younger audience through e-readers they may be cutting themselves off from a book reading public. I’ll end with a quote from English writer, Ian McEwan: “When women stop reading, the novel will be dead.”

Check-Mate

                   

One of the pleasures of reading biographies is getting insights into characters, whether we can identify with them or not. While away from my desk I read British author and historian Alison Weir’s biography of the six wives of Henry VIII— a colorful composite of history with amazing stories. I feel as though I’ve hit the mother lode of characterization. Each woman is unique and complex. There was so much information that I thought it would be fun to come up with a Queen Wife characterization list that anyone can use for their own writing.


Hear Ye Hear Ye:
First there was Catherine of Aragon who had the virtues of being intelligent and brave, but she was also intransigent. She was Henry’s devoted for wife for 24 years. But after a point she should have entered a nunnery and everyone would have been happier. Henry cast her aside when she didn’t provide an heir. Don’t you know people who are so sure they are right that they are willing to destroy all around them? Are they fueled by virtue or by false pride?


And then there’s Anne Boleyn, who was charming, seductive, and had the King’s passion and attention. But she also had a bad temper and when she began to panic about her relationship with the King, she behaved so outrageously that she pushed him away. If she could have stopped angering the King, she might have lived longer. Fear influences and changes a person’s behavior. Don’t you know people who undercut their relationships with others because of something they do?


Jane Seymour was a docile and devoted wife. King Henry said he loved her best of all his wives. She gave Henry his heir. But she was lonely because she would only associate with people of her stature. Don’t you know people who seem to have it all, but are really lonely on the inside? How does a person suffer with isolation when they cut themselves off believing they are better than everyone else?


Then there was Anne of Cleves, whose misfortune it was to be plain. She suffered an unbelievable insult when Henry put her away. Poor thing, but somehow with her compliance to accept her fate she wound up happiest of the wives. She found the secret to contentment. And the property and funds she acquired most likely helped. Had she lived today she could have written a best-seller. How do your characters search for happiness?


Fifth, and most tragic, was Catherine Howard, whose biggest problem was that she was young, naïve and committed adultery. Her tenure as Queen was short-lived. Learning about Catherine Howard gives a taste for the wild, and being out of control. Don't you know someone who is headed for disaster and there’s not a thing you can do?


And finally the sixth and final wife, Catherine Parr, who had the most modern feel to her because she knew what was going on and used it to her advantage. She became nursemaid to the fat and aging Henry. She was the least likeable character because she seemed so calculating, but I suppose anyone marrying a man who had two of his wives executed, would be cautious. How far will your characters go to get what they want?


What do you think? Any of the queenly wives remind you of either people you know that you can spin into a character? Or a character you have used in a story?

His bambina

My father was the rock of our family. Even though he was a talented businessman, he never stopped trying to do more, be more and extend his capacities. 

He was always looking to create the next opportunity, always looking for the next step up.

We were all so proud of him. His drive and determination rubbed off on his children.

He never got the chance to retire, because he died young. But his zest for life throughout his short time on earth was to work hard and play hard. He pampered himself every other year with a new car, custom-made Italian suits and owned a Patek Philippe watch. His idea of casual was a cashmere sweater. He found pleasure in entertaining and being with his family. Although if anyone were to ask my mother she would say his greatest excitement came from work and achievement. He cultivated a love of music- in particular dance, and a love of all things Italian and spoke it fluently. He also liked the spring and summer which for him meant swimming, fishing, baseball and his male bonding time included playing poker while drinking Hennessy Cognac. Although he was not the type to come to Las Vegas, he would have preferred Monte Carlo.

There was something in him that was young and fun. But all of that is now behind him. His entire future collapsed when he got ill and he was sick for a very long time.

After he died, I realized that I wish I would have spent more time with him — time, something I had all but taken for granted because I was young.

Time.

Why hadn’t I gone fishing with him more than a handful of times, and why didn’t I go to visit him more often? I always thought I would have plenty of time.

Even so, there was nowhere near enough time.

Time is suppose to blur the hurt but it can't blur memories. I remember him whenever I do something that is resourceful, or when I challenge the authorities and win or when my mind conjures up something creative and ingenious that hasn't been done before. At those times, I tell myself I am his daughter. When I watch my brother speak directly and firmly without raising his voice to get his message across and others acquiesce, I see my father. When I watch my one nephew determined to win his rowing race while others slump from exhaustion, I see my father. And when my younger nephew says something witty beyond his years and all the girls circle around him, I also see my father.

No I didn't have enough time with him, but his spirit lives on, within me and around me.

What about you, do you remember your Dad on Father's Day or throughout the year? Would you like to share a story?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y04seHfYLAA&list=PL99CC46FE7D8902F3

Is it worth the effort?

Summer

 

This will be my last installment on blogging. It's been a cruel summer in Las Vegas and with so many things going on in my life, and in a writing mode, I haven't been posting as often. But I will say this, blogging is like anything else, you have to love it to do it. There are many reasons to blog as there are bloggers, but here's my take on whether or not a writer should start a blog:

I can attest that blogging can be work, even if you only post once a week. Many bloggers say there is the constant nag running through their brain about what to write next. Then there is the writing itself, that often needs to be polished. Blogging is time-consuming, and takes away from your other writing tasks. It's why many writers when working on a book or project choose not to post. And you have to consider whether you have a topic worth blogging about. It is highly unlikely that you will develop a following if you only post random musings once in a while. Most successful blogs carve out a niche that is sustained by regular posts and is broad enough to support posting, without repetition, thus gaining a well-defined audience. And within a couple of years it's possible that there seems to be a conversation going on, especially if your passion shines through in your topic and voice.

For a writer, blogging is essential to build a platform. Blogging can make your writing visible to the world when you have a readership, but they must be responsive. Developing a readership is often like pulling teeth, you're begging for comments and often readers won't take action. They'll read the post, and move on to something else.

Writing a blog can also help you to identify your audience and their concerns. But wouldn't you rather hear critical or thought-provoking comments that silence? I know I would. Blogging can become a way of vetting the soundness of your ideas, and of finding new avenues you hadn't thought of exploring. Also, writing regularly will assist you in developing your voice. And it can take years before you get comfortable and settle into a voice that marks your blog.

So, do you have a specific subject to blog about? Are you ready to start writing weekly posts on a variety of issues within your chosen topic? Can you envision not just one or two posts on your subject, but many of them? If so, then you may be ready to start a blog.

I use Google's Blogger for teaching purposes and my primary platform is Word Press that is connected to my website. Word Press tends to be somewhat prettier for photo-concentrated blogs; while Blogger has a more seamless integration with Amazon. There are many considerations involved in choosing to blog or not but if you do decide to start a blog, good luck and shoot me your link!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPNhV1gF008

A Balancing Act

Millions of people have blogs. Only a fraction of them do it well enough to achieve real benefit, in terms of income, visibility, or sheer entertainment. It's a balancing act. I'm going to point out three areas for you to consider before you join the band of bloggers. While it's simple to start a blog, it takes vigilance and skill to do it really well, as is true of any kind of writing. Here are some things to keep in mind. 

 

Comments

Blogging can be a lonely business but when I hear from my readers the act of writing and posting becomes interactive, exciting and social. I really do love your comments! They make this all worthwhile. I try to respond to each one. Anti-spam programs including Askimet protect my comment form, so sometimes a real comment will make its way to a spam or moderation folder. I don’t moderate comments other than to make sure they’re not smut or spam. If you’re reading this I hope I’ve encouraged you to drop me a line or two. I’d love to hear from you.

Keep in Touch

If you like my blog I hope you will consider subscribing. I keep two blogs; one is simply an example for teaching purposes: Echo Between Us, on Blogger. My real blog is connected to my website: www.lindalaroche.com/blog and I use Word Press. There is a simple way to subscribe; just click on the right orange logo to the left of The Quill. You’ll receive an e-mail with each new post. I’m also active on Twitter https://twitter.com/lindalaroche07 and to a lesser extent Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lindalaroche07.

Disclosures

As the author of How to Write Short Stories to be Proud Of, I occassionally have a sale. Most bloggers profit from advertising or sponsorship from other companies. However, in both cases, it's peanuts. When a blog makes a bit of money it helps pay for web hosting and other fees associated with running the blog, but I've yet to put topple over from the imbalance of fat pockets, so my blog posts and time are currently uncompensated. I very much hope my readers will click on the Buy Now button on the right and consider purchasing my Ebook. 

 

I believe in full disclosure, so if someone wants to sponsor an article I will consider it and specifically mention it in a post. Whether a post is sponsored or not, as the Editor In Chief of the Quill, I only write about the things I love, things that I think about, that stir something inside me, or writing tips that have worked for me, to share with you. Writing, expression and sharing are my passion. When I see students forming little clusters talking about what they are doing and what they have learned, it makes my heart sing. My aim is to be honest yet positive. What I remark as good writing or needing improvement in a class or on my blog is subjective and I cannot guarantee that you will feel the same way. Whether you agree or disagree with me, please voice your opinion. I enjoy hearing from you!

One message I pass onto my blogging students that I too have heard is that blogs must have a theme, a focus, a sort of statement that everything revolves around… but how do you figure out what that theme is? 
 

What shall I choose?

How do you choose what to make your blog about? If you don’t want to follow a theme such as party planning, cooking or pets, how do you figure out what to write about? Yourself perhaps?

It may be too specific but a blog about you is obviously harder to promote or find a target audience for than another topic— right?  Or wrong?

Personally I enjoy non-themed blogs and wish there were more of them.  I love going to a blog and not knowing what’s going to be posted there.  Funny stories about life incidents.  Home décor ideas.  Ethnic recipes.  To me a good blog is one that reads like a magazine, curated and edited by someone interesting and, I appreciate funny writers.

Let’s discuss a few problems and solutions of non-themed blogging.

Obstacle: A non-themed blog can miss out on some lucrative themed sponsorship.
We all know certain fashion brands that love the blogosphere, but if you’re not a fashion blogger, they probably won’t come a-knocking.  And if you’re not a beauty blogger, companies like Benefit and Body Shoppe aren’t going to fall all over themselves advertising with you.  When those companies are googling blogs, your URL won’t come up.
Remedy: Add some themed content – and make sure everybody knows it.  You shouldn’t write about something specific to court specific advertisers or readers, but a themed series will give your blog a more cohesive, well-rounded feel. And it makes it more likely that advertisers and bloggers in that niche will link to you and advertise with you.

Obstacle: Nobody knows what my blog is about when they land on my site.
Your friends may review your blog and shout-out: today you’re talking about spirituality and last time you were on psychological family issues. What the heck is going on?
Remedy: Write a clever tagline
Did you know that I’m a professional copywriter? This is where I can place my copywriter hat on for you (think  Sherlock Holmes deerstalker cap).  If your blog is un-themed, then you need a clever tagline.  Something like “Every relationship can be adventuresome” or “On the internet since 2009.”

Obstacle:  My blog looks messy
If you’re writing about everything under the sun things can get visually overwhelming.
Remedy: Stick with a color theme and keep your header and sidebar simple. Unless I’m doing a current events post, I try to choose black and white photos that compliment my red header. I didn’t plan it that way, but instinctively went with black and cream since it exudes classic style and sophistication.  It’s also dramatic. You may choose soft colors, bright colors or neutrals, however if you refuse to be limited to a certain color palette, try a header/template that’s simple and crisp so your images will be bright and engaging, not busy and tacky. Remember—balance is key.

Obstacle: There are a lot of un-themed blogs out there, how can I stand out?
Remedy: The blogosphere is rife with ladies taking pictures of themselves in thrift store outfits, from their bedrooms, showing off their tattoos, and promoting Etsy. Find and amplify your difference. I love travel and wanted to share my smart and solo adventures that I went on in my 20′s and 30′s as an online diary.  At the time I was told, “you have guts.” By sharing them later, I got to travel write.  I also love fashion, so I turned my dresses into conversation pieces, also known as anthropomorphism http://lindalaroche.com/blog/dress-you-up.html  http://lindalaroche.com/blog/bespoken.html.  Perhaps you live in Iceland or sky dive as a hobby.  You don’t have to make your point of difference the point of your blog, but play it up! You’re an expert at one unique thing that others will find fascinating!

The Unfolding of a Life

I've been on an incredible voyage (details are in my Travel Diary) but am content to be home where I am surrounded by the life-affirming green of my garden, and warm smiles. So it is back to work for me, studying my thoughts, observing others, and planning new teaching events.

Soldier feeding Goat

I have had a fascination with World War II, although it may seem to others to be unexplainable- (my parents didn't meet until 1953), to me (my soul) it is familiar. With that in mind, I'm posting these vintage photos from the 1940's along with one that reminds us of how children suffer the ignorance and atrocities committed by their parents.

Girl comforting Doll

Everyday there is news of natural disasters and horror just as great as a War. In the past and now each of us needs to stay centered in the whirl and swirl of nasty collective astral currents, so let us make sure not to overly personalize our dramas since it invites expansion. I'm not advocating to deny or suppress personal pain, but to work to transform it and grow wise and more generous in the process. This is accomplished through the recognition that there is a higher magnetism of love that is tangible and palpable and as we draw up into It, It draws down into us.

Man with Book

As usual your comments are welcome. 

Desperate Mother selling Children

 

The Chain Goes On

One of the great things about a blog post is that it can be published at a later date. I meant to do that with this post but got side-tracked when offered a photography work assignment, then came computer technical problems and a trip out of town. So taking that is stride, here's my post, altered and late as it is.

I believe lessons that our mothers taught us apply any time of year. The mother-daughter bond is truly fragile but unbreakable. Though most women don't acknowledge, they share a very strong bond with their mothers.

A mother brings up her daughter with utmost care and passes down the lessons of self-respect and self-esteem. They watch their daughters grow eagerly worrying about their daughter's survival - physically, psychologically, and socially. They have great expectations for their daughter’s life and hope their daughters won’t have to face a life that they experienced. A mother expects her daughter to be able to overcome difficulties that come her way and be more successful than her.

Daughters have great expectations from their mothers. They look up to her as their role model. And if their expectations are not met they get very disappointed—and it takes many years to soothe the hurt. Until a girl reaches that period of her life when she has to make a life of her own, little does she understand what her mother was to her. Life is like a roller coaster for every woman. And it becomes more complex with age and the best companion she can age along with is her mother.

When I was growing up my mother was not the most expressive or flexible person. Although she had a feminine look, she was and still is very strong when it comes to emotions. Hard-working, she was extremely proficient at handling pressures and handled the most worst of situations. An introvert, she chooses her friends very cautiously. She is private, trustworthy, caring, and has quiet dignity. Something about her seems big; yet she is petite and small-boned, a brunette with fair skin who looks dynamic in the color red. She is conservative by nature— and loves to cook and prefers the comforts of her own home to being elsewhere.

If I were to choose one quality that her example gave me it would be this— she does not believe the first impression is the last impression; instead she lets others behavior speak for them, over time. It took me a long time to heed that message, but now I live by it.

What one tradition or trait did you adopt from your mother that did not come naturally to your personality?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72uUzYqa4xA

Stand my Ground

Today my Blog is four years old, older than my doggie, so with that in mind I’m writing about her.

Yesterday I was in my kitchen baking Linzer Torte with the windows open when I heard kids outside yell out, “That’s Coco’s house.”  Soon the door was pounding.  Bubbling behind the door, you’d think it was the Kaiser’s birthday party.  They had balloons and chocolate leaf cookies and wanted to play with her.  I peered in disapproval at the chocolate but told them she could go out later, when I would be ready to supervise.  The children have always been generous in dispensing gifts to her. Although she spends her time running back and forth as they do, and barks acting as a referee to any injustice, not only do they continue to dot on her but they love her.   

Very few know of Coco’s story.  It reads like a version of Little Match Girl, a short-story by Hans Christian Andersen. Cold and hungry, and left to die alone in a foreclosed home her barks saved her.  She was taken to Lied Animal Shelter, where she most likely questioned the meaning of life and of play.  

There in November 2011, dehydrated at a mere ten pounds, I spotted her.  When I reached in to pet her she immediately licked my hand.  Staring, shining, scintillating… I thought who is that skinny doggie and where did she come from? Was she the darling of some Las Vegas stage performer?

In shades of gray and tan with a black chevron down her back, she’s half-Miniature Schnauzer and Yorkie, what’s called a Schnorkie but looks like a little lamb. Here I thought is my puppy and mistook the thoughtful look of Coco’s enormous pretty brown eyes and long eyelashes for tranquility.

Once out of the shelter, Coco began to make her presence known.  She was energetic, fiery and spunky.  Not anxious or suspicious of either people or animals, she adores new experiences.  As an intelligent, courageous creature; she is the friendliest canine at the doggie park.  At home, she has a hearty appetite, and is subtle and unsubtle, loudly indignant and softly stubborn, sly, sweet, resourceful and interesting all the way. 

As for words... Coco is natural-born linguist. It's enough to talk to her because she understands and will do what I ask. She shows her uniqueness and originality and rarely does anything by rote. On occasions when she demonstrates her ardent temperament she then cocks her head and I see wings and halos circle her head.

Now at a healthy lean twenty pounds, she is a fierce protector of home and hearth, a thoroughly engaging personality, and brings love, friendship, and zest for life to our household, the neighborhood and to everyone she meets. 

Because of her determination to correct any wrongdoing, I tell my husband if she were human she’d be true to her sun sign and be an activist.  She’s also clairvoyant. Meanwhile I’m on a hunt to find her a collar with peace sign logos. 

This is her theme song: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUTXb-ga1fo