Today my day was filled with mechanical things, writing this blog post came as a creative thought and by writing it, I am following through on my own advise. Hooray.
I’ll admit, though, that it’s a steep challenge to shut out the follow-up thoughts, such as: Who cares? Why are you writing about the challenge of writing when you could be working on some other more concrete (not to mention commercial) idea you’ve had cluttering your brain for years, which people would probably enjoy more? Of course, then you’d have to decide which of the other possibilities to execute first. The one most likely to sell? Or the one you’re burning to write? You are aiming low by writing a blog post– because, come to think of it, no one reads your blog.
I realize it is possibly a waste for me to display those secondary thoughts for you here. Maybe you can relate.
Some of my best ideas, the ones I’ve followed through on in my life, have come to me while walking by myself, whether on a quiet hiking path or a bustling, noisy, narrow city street. One time, when I was jogging through the Rose Bowl, I felt compelled to call my answering machine and borrowed a jogger's cell phone, so I could record a story idea that came up. I got home, and wrote it as an essay. I trust my instincts. But I have confidence in my ideas and when they start to percolate, and every time I went with them, it paid off.
When I hit a certain plateau in my writing, people around me, expecting more started asking, “When are you going to publish your own book already?” Already. What an awful, disappointment-saturated word – one I’d already sent knocking around my brain on my own. Not that those people deserve any blame for what's happened in my life or in the publishing landscape. I am not blaming them – they say those things with the best of intentions, to be encouraging. The implied message is, “When do I get to read your book? I can’t wait! I know it will be good!” As a perfectionist, it was an expectation I had of myself, but I took so long to do it, because of my fear of taking a chance unless I was guaranteed a positive outcome, and that's what made me hear their encouragement all wrong. It's why I can now perpetuate this message to my students –don't let your inner critic keep you from conceiving and then aborting what are probably decent ideas. What are you waiting for? Live and write now!
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