Write On

I've been a reader and writer ever since I can remember. Even before I could read by myself, I recall sitting next to my grandmother on the mauve living room sofa listening to her read in her light soprano voice. I was captivated by the scent of rose that emanated from her skin and the idea of books bringing stories to life. As a child I wrote stories prominently featuring girls talking to small critters such as birds, bunnies and poodles and the animals talking back.

I continue to read voraciously and love finding unusual books that are so good I wish I could read them for the first time again. As an adult, in my solitude I felt a depth of feelings that were very intense. And it was that intensity of emotion that led me back to writing. It opened my life.

Writing and reading decrease our sense of isolation. They deepen and widen and expand our sense of life: they feed the soul. When writers make us shake our heads with the exactness of their prose and their truths, and even make us laugh about ourselves or life, our buoyancy is restored. We are given a chance at dancing with, or at least clapping along with, the absurdity of life, instead of being squashed by it time and time again. It's like singing on a boat during a terrible storm at sea. You can't stop the raging storm, but singing can change the hearts and spirits of the people who are together on the ship.

Are you a reader or a writer? And what has reading and writing done for you?

Love is not blind, it's kind

Last night I went to dinner and every-time I opened my mouth I was interrupted; as a result I did not discuss my life, interests or thoughts. Although I enjoy listening (I am given understanding and future material) I would have been better off elsewhere. Being selective of my time and dislike wasting it for things that don't enlighten me, help me to help others or bring me pleasure, I was intellectually bored.  

Everybody thinks they are good at listening – after all, it just involves a bit of concentration and not saying anything. Simple. Or is it?

In my first class I have students gather into couples and listen to one another for five minutes without interrupting or taking notes. Then I have them each give a summary of what they have heard.

I do this to promote effective communication. The art of listening and ability to concentrate is crucial for good writing.

Sometimes there can be a worry that if someone is given a chance to speak uninterrupted, they will go on forever, but often they will take up much less time than if they are interrupted.

The shortest distance between two points is a straight line and in the same way, an uninterrupted stream of talking will flow more quickly to its end point, if one is continuously caused to deviate from its path by a change of topic, opinions and other comments. The repetitions and wider explanations are the speaker's response to these interruptions, leading to a longer period of speaking.

When people experience interruptions they resort to speaking in choppy sentences, don't complete their thoughts and there is a likelihood that they will not be listening either when people speak to them, because they will have developed the strategy of thinking of their next answer or comment to squeeze in whatever they can– because it has become a competition to be heard– rather than a real conversation.

In this way, ineffective listening is mutually induced in both people having the conversation. So basically, it only takes one person to break the circle of decline in the quality of the listening.

So why do people not listen? Because they believe that they and their words are more important than anyone or anything else. Yes, it comes down to arrogance. Sure, some folks will use their faulty memories as an excuse.

The brain can mold. When it has formed a bad habit; such as conditioned not to listen, being like elastic it is capable of learning something new and will benefit in the long run from the expansion.

With the practice of uninterrupted time, a listener can listen and the speaker can speak without anxiety that they will have to fend off interruptions. The effectiveness and quality of the communication increases enormously as a result. And isn't that form of respect what friendship is really about? 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nw1lmCS11A8

Ole Miss

You is kind, you is smart, you is important– the opening lines that character Aibilene played by actress Viola Davis says as the maid-nanny to the toddler she cares for in the film, The Help (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1454029/). Perhaps not the best usage of the English language but the intent was to give the little girl, Mae Mobley who has been love starved by her mother, a sense of self-worth. And, since Aibilene is silently mourning her son’s untimely death, to compensate for her loss, she forms a strong, loving bond with the child, who she attempts to potty train.

There are several relationships woven throughout the film that are very touching. Main character, Skeeter, who returns to her hometown of Jackson after graduating from the University of Mississippi, is determined to become a writer. Her relationship with her mother, with her childhood friend Hilly, and to the black maids are all well developed. And so is maid Minny's friendship with Aibilene and Minny's relationship to her employer, bombshell, Miss Celia.

The movie, primarily focuses on the struggles African-Americans faced in the south during the 1960s before the civil rights movement. Skeeter exposes the injustices the African-American community was experiencing and Aibilene in turn develops a growing admiration for Skeeter.

While many film adaptations of books (http://amzn.to/odt5OM) aren’t emotionally moving, and don’t feature as many in-depth characters and themes, as their source material, this is one film that stayed true to the novel. Ironically, as I was walking out, I was silently rooting for an Oscar for Viola Davis and thought of how black audiences would perceive the film, would they view it as mockery or see it as a story of truth that evolved from a shameful undercurrent of racism. Two elderly women engaged in conversation with me, originally from the South and said that's the way it was. I left the theater thinking whichever way it unfolds viewers will feel courageous and want to stand up for what’s right.

Those who say yes have more fun

How do we make that scary leap from thinking about writing to actually doing it?
Now, I cannot claim to be a total expert on this. There are many things that I'd like to do/am in the process of doing that may never fall under the done heading. Hiking in Nepal, taking flying lessons, and competing in a triathlon to name a few. However, I do have a decent track record of actually completing a good number of the seemingly improbable things that I set out to do. Here's what has worked for me:

Write it down, then start mapping your path
We all know that putting pen to paper is one of the best ways to make things happen. It'll start to seem realistic when you look at it on paper. Taking it further helps even more; research, do your own due diligence and start compiling the information that will bridge the gap between what's inside your head and what's not.

Blast it
Tell everybody about it! Anybody worth knowing will be excited for you and feed your enthusiasm. Also, you'll be a less likely to back out of your plan because everyone you know will be asking you about it. Shame can be a great motivator.

Spend money on it
Most will be exponentially more likely to complete a goal that they spend money on. It's a great step towards getting there.

Make it irreversible
Now that you're making tendrils of progress, keep going. When you're really serious about something and you know intuitively, that it's the right choice, don't allow yourself the luxury of a backup plan. I once bought a one-way, non-refundable ticket, to Europe expecting to stay for six months and instead it turned into three years. Be courageous! By putting yourself at the mercy of fate you are going to have so much fun!

Doing begets more doing
I've found that action begets more action. Once you've published your novella, you know that you are capable of moving to Hong Kong on your own, or learning to speak Hindi, and you can't be deterred from starting an import business–all these things are totally doable, you go-getter, you!  

Thru my eyes

The story of The Little Prince continues to be a mainstay favorite of people of all ages; indeed, I don't know anyone who is well-read who has not heard of this classic story.

The story can basically be split into two parts: The first part is the brief introduction dealing with the narrator and his view of the world when he was a child (plus his drawings of the inside and outside of a boa constrictor) and how adults could never understand the real meaning of things or perceive truth in the world–only the superficial and the usual.

The Little Prince describes his journey from planet to planet, each tiny world populated by a single adult. It's a wonderfully inventive sequence, which evokes not only the great fairy tales but also monuments of postmodern whimsy whenever the author pokes fun at the following: a king, a conceited man, a tippler, a businessman, a geographer, and a lamplighter, all of whom signify some futile aspect of adult existence.

On another level, you can see the Little Prince's travels to other planets as an allegory throughout life. What are we seeking for? How do you know when we have found it? How do we lose what is important? The examples of self-absorbed adults, beginning with the aviator, provide many cautionary tales. "Don't you see– I'm very busy with matters of consequence!"

The rest of the book is the story of the Little Prince, whom the narrator discovers in the Sahara is trying to fix his downed airplane and is in fear of his life. The narrator and the reader slowly come to know the prince's story and learn about friendship, love and truth in a touching way. "To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand little foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world..."

The best parts are those dealing with the prince's relationship with his beloved proud rose (her four thorns are supposed to protect her from tigers) left on his planet and the prince's relationship with the wise little fox, who offers the prince his philosophical secret on life. "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

The boy's innocent, yet loyal relationship with the flower, leaves me with the question: Should we love only those whom are deserving of love, whom are capable of loving us back? Or do we love whole-heartedly whether we get love in return or not? And, how do we replenish the well of love if we keep giving out and do not receive it back?

The book holds many different levels of meaning. In fact, the wider your mind and heart, the more you will appreciate the story. But the narrower your mind and heart, the more you need this story.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiUxtUV1o-s&feature=related